10.31.2012

I decided to celebrate Halloween in true style: drinking coffee.

Some people don the visages of scary things from myth and legend, others find entertainment in the disturbing and questionably dead, still others take it further with lawn decorations of haunted gore and death.

Others drink disgusting beverages.

Fits.

10.30.2012

This pattern of sacrificing sleep for...things...is resulting in two very different but equally detrimental manifestations:

1. Haphazard sleepiness

2. Drinking coffee


Today, it happened to be a "Sumatra" blend. Sounds saucy. And sketchy. Typically, the two go hand-in-hand. Why should I expect coffee to be any different?

So far, I cannot discern one difference between all of these different blend things.

They have all been rather on par for the level of disgusting that all coffee maintains.

10.26.2012

This morning there was no sugar - real sugar - in any form near the coffee. It's logistaically hard to explain, but suffice it to say, I would've had to go to a lot of work to find sugar.

So I used Splenda.

This morning I discovered that Splenda, like coffee, is also disgusting. Not as bad. But disgusting is disgusting.

It's also never a good idea to combine two disgusting things.

10.25.2012

Two-Cup-Thursday. That's what I will now refer to the fourth day of the calendar week as. I think it really says a lot about Thursdays:

"Two cups?!"

"Yeah. It's an early morning at 5AM. With multiple hours of class before work."

"Still, that's a lot of coffee."

"Good point..."

I guess it doesn't quite capture it. It doesn't quite illustrate the nature of Thursday being so brutal, that I resort to drinking something so disgusting.

And do it twice.

Before 10AM.

10.24.2012

Yet again, physical fragility has driven me to attempt consumption of coffee.

I wish I could blame my physical fragility on coffee. I know I can't. I don't drink it nearly enough. But of all the things to use as a scapegoat, coffee is pretty darn ideal.

I don't know. I'll tuck that idea away. Might be useful someday.

"Blonde Roast" again. I don't mind this thing as much as most others. Probably because it's mostly water, which is apparently an essential biological component. Love water.

I can't decide what's worse, the feeling of the potential need to regurgitate, or the taste of coffee.

Pretty even.

10.22.2012

Friday I tasted what could be classified as the worst cup of coffee that has ever been made. Not trying to be dramatic. But that was a literal statement.

Back to square one.

I've taken a two-day hiatus from coffee. Conveniently, it was the weekend.

However, in light of sleep-depravity and fear of sugar-over-dose, I am giving coffee a fourteenth chance.



























"Blonde Roast". We'll see...

10.18.2012

9AM and it has already proven to be "quite a day".

Three. Days. InARow. Coffee. I'm serious. This is not okay.

Hold on.

It gets catastrophically worse...

Today, I had two cups of coffee.


It's a bit intuitive, given that Thursdays start at 5AM and posses two hours of class before work.

But also not intuitive (nor acceptable), because coffee is filthy. And I don't mean that like college kids mean it when they talk about dubstep music. I mean it like when mothers talk about their children's clothing being covered in dirt.


Water. Covered in dirt.

10.17.2012

Coffee. Full cup. Two days in a row. This is getting weird.

Don't get ahead of yourself. It still tastes rather disgusting. I would be lying if I told you I consistently finished a cup of coffee when I attempted to drink it. Just can't do it.

But shoot. I get free Starbucks at work, so I don't really lose anything...like money. Or time. Except taste buds and energy spent wincing in disgusted agony.

Today, the culprit was an "Invisible" "blend". I think because it was mostly water and food coloring. Either way, it tasted better than most coffee.

Maybe it was all that sugar I laced it with.

10.16.2012

Today, I decided to drink coffee. Not out of necessity for caffeine. Not because intense peer-pressure related to my self-esteem and manhood pushed me to it. Nope. I wanted to try it.

I went to the coffee-maker. Two options: "Blonde Roast" and "(something something) Extra Bold". Extra bold seemed like the opposite of what role I wanted to coffee to play. So I poured the blonde thing. Of course it runs dry, with only half of my cup full. "Ah well". I sigh aloud, topping off my cup with the bold stuff.

Don't kid yourself. Absolutely I added two sugars and two creams. What are you, nuts?

May it be known: Today, for some yet unknown and equally unlikely reason, coffee did not taste disgusting.

10.09.2012

Drinking coffee today out of necessity. Lack of sleep coupled with excessive work hours give caffeine an unusual allure.

Unfortunately, things like Mt. Dew and Coca Cola are fare more fruitful and pleasing mediums of obtaining the caffeine-originating alertness.

Still they taunt me. "It's more healthy". "It's warm and tasty". "It doesn't kill your sperm or give you cancer". Whatever.

Today, like every day before it, coffee is disgusting.

10.03.2012

I guess I'm a few cups into my "career" as a coffee drinker.

I wouldn't call myself a coffee drinker. I just do it for the sake of others. Others telling me I should want to like coffee.

I have this stigma against acquired tastes. If you have to go through myriads of toil, anguish, and scalded tongue-flesh to arrive at a point where something tastes good - this thing is not worth tasting.

Coffee is an acquired taste. If there is a homosapien that claims to have liked coffee from their very first taste - they are wrong. Or they had memories erased, like in that Ben Affleck movie, Paycheck.

09.26.2012

I didn't even make it two whole days before trying coffee again.

I really need to spend less time with baristas...there is too much social pressure to consume something that both burns my mouth, and tastes like boiled clay.

Today I imbibed what was to my taste buds something quite similar to every other "cup of coffee" I have yet encountered...

It was disgusting.

I did, however, have a very few and fleeting moments of hopeful bless when I would feel the warm and familiar presence of sugar against my tongue...but I guess that is just because sugar tastes good...

09.24.2012

Hey...

Today I had what seems to be my first intentional cup of "normal" coffee for years.

It was disgusting.

I say "normal" because I possess no other words in my vernacular with which to describe it. It's not a mocha, or a latte, or cappuccino (as far as I can tell)  or any of those other incredibly complicated and surprisingly tasty coffee-spiced drinks. It's just...coffee.

I put some cream and sugar in there. One of each. This is how I would describe how much I think it altered the offensive and pervasive flavor of coffee: not at all.

Sigh...maybe I will try again. One day...